MRI Day

As things were unwinding and we were getting the full picture of what was going on in my body to understand pregnancy options, I had an MRI done when they found my uterus was mis-shapen.

Two things I will remember from my MRI day:

1. Brent came with me which I think is what made me so calm the whole day. He was able to come into the MRI room and put ear plugs in. When they would pull out the shelf I was on to rearrange me, I was able to look back at him which makes me feel like he is really in this with me. During the abdomen scan, there was a lot of holding 30 second breaths, catching your breath and repeating. When we were driving back to work together, I told him “Thanks for holding your breath with me” and he looked at me and grinned and said “How did you know I was holding my breath too?” Just did.

They sent us home with a CD of the images which totally reminds us we are not doctors! It is like looking at ink blots and making images out of blobs! I think I saw a cow skull! As Brent studied the diagram of the female anatomy and translated that to my MRI scan, while I fixed dinner, I thought I bet he never imagined he would be doing this! We laughed through squirms when he said “Now I know you inside and out”.

2. Melody called me to see how it went and told me she was thinking about me all day. We talked about it and before she hung up, she told me she had written an “A” on her hand so she would constantly remember me and pray for me. Wow! It is such a neat feeling to be loved on and feel the support surrounding us through the testing and diagnosis. It really shows me the importance of doing the same for others in their times of trial.

Hopeful

After last weeks news, the only way to describe my reaction was spinning uncontrollably. The biggest disappointment to me was knowing I am a Christian and not responding to this circumstance that God is in full control. I found all of this out on Wednesday and Friday was the hardest. Any song, email, or thought sent tears to my eyes and shook my core. A teary phone call to Brent from work was what changed my whole perspective away from thinking the worst. The bible verse he kept repeating to me was Matthew 6:28. “See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor of spin.” He GOT it before me. Reading on in that passage, I realize I must “Seek first His kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given unto you”. Hearing Brent tell me he loves me NO MATTER WHAT definitely helped and made me feel like we are really in this together. All of the insignificance I felt melted away when I realized God knew me in my mother’s womb and formed me this way—He brought me here—Heaven is a part of me and I am His creation.
Is it unfathomable that He is working ALL things new in me right this minute, No. Is it too far out to think He put this road block in our lives to make us thirst for parenthood? No. He gives us the desires of our heart. Can he be glorified for creating a miracle in my body, Yes—he has done it throughout history. Will I trust in Him with all my heart from this moment on? Yes. Could this be my witness and strengthen my faith, oh yes! I have much to hope for and a life ahead of me that God designed- I wonder how it will unfold and how we will be forever changed. I do not fear what is ahead, I embrace it and look forward to seeing God’s face and making His name known.

1 Peter 4:
12 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.